Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Jabber

Well.. I'm heading for the last shaastra as a CETian and this time the hopes are really high... I'm confident we are definitely gonna rock this time around.. Learning from past experiences, we seven have come a long way... Its been a roller coaster ride this 3 years and it al seems so fresh as if it had been yesterday that we all walked the stairs to our first year class.. We've grown more mature and our bond of friendship strengthened by each second we pass together.. This surely has been the best part of my life... For sure i'm gonna miss them all.. The sense of isolation came to me yesterday too.. I'm scared but i believe if i dont face my fears now i might not be able to overcome it in the future as well... I wanna be a complete man in an emotional sense when i pass out so that i can build on my experiences that i may encounter in the future.. To be prepared for the real life i must be. or perhaps life aint that different at all... just a bigger picture of the present may give the true nature of the future... The lack of clarity of thought has haunted me a lot but i guess its time for me to grow up, stand up to what is right and raise my voice for the good... Well.. my mind is as discordant as this post is but i have faith in myself some day it'll all come together and i shal feel true inside of mine.. Acceptance, forgiveness and healing... Some of the things i need to understand.. I need to know myself.. but how? I feel a lot more comfortable when i'm alone, when i'm left on my own... But i'm lazy then.. or i'm misdirected more correctly... too many things occupy me then and i hit a stand still.. focus, that is what is needed... direction wil come with focus and peace of mind and the power to face the unknown...